Sunday, February 25, 2007
i'm excited for ilp tmr! =)maybe for the first time this yr =/ frankly speaking, neither has ilp been really productive this yr, nor has it made me look fwd to it. maybe its due to the fact that it robs me of my precious 2hr break! although i get them 4 times a week, but it doesnt really count as a break once u get to j2. i can't get anything done for my research in the confined 2 hrs anyway. art needs space, time and freedom! especially when my theme circulates daydreaming...you can't just ask me to daydream like that. there's so much procedures to go through before i can't sink into the daydreaming mood. (for e.g.: boring me with maths lectures, making me swim 20 laps and feel freaking tired...) heh...some pple coincide with my thoughts. glad i'm nt de only one. but i still hope ilp will become more productive in the near future, without any disturbances or rushing for progress.
anw, pt is: my studio's space gonna undergo major revamp tmr! yay! =)
and my dear orange asics gel cumulus are going to retire for now. thx for having served me so faithfully for the past yr. i'll really miss you. NO MORE ORANGE! T_T
posted @ 7:04 PM
Monday, February 19, 2007
Why is it that every time they do something wrong, I'm the one who gets lectured? I'm the one who gets told to 'not follow after their footsteps'; to 'not talk back'; to 'love your brothers and sisters'....i can almost compile a book of 'Junhua's Parents Preaches'. maybe thats why I've become the way i am, to turn a deaf ear to the things they say. one thing's for sure, things definitely aren't working out the way they want it to. in fact, its adverse effects are taking place.i understand how they feel, every single one of them, i really do. coz I'm watching everything from a third person's point of view, like in a cinema. every quarrel is like a battle scene in a war show - exciting, spine-tingling, nerve-wrecking, heart-piercing. I've become so weathered to these kind of shows I've learnt to exclude myself from the emotional turmoil it brings. its quite easy actually. sometimes a patronizing smile or a pseudo-understanding sigh would do. i'm not being hypocritical here, just a sign of self-defense. if i were to open my heart to all these and let it all crash down on me in torrents, i doubt I'll be a sane person now.
but sometimes its not that easy to shield your fragile heart from the cruelties. especially when you naively think everything's calmed down. its like being trapped in the middle of a cyclone. you think you're safe when you're at the eye of the storm and you come out to play, but you never know when the rains would hit you again. its so unpredictable. in the midst of enjoying your reunion meal, you sense spiteful sparks at the corner of your eye thats ready to explode any minute. so much for (V) peace.
but i continue to eat in self-delusion.
i realize people switch alliance all the time. one moment you're taking sides with her, the next minute you may have switched to side him.
maybe that's why I'm such a confused little child. resulting in self-isolation this entire cny. i dare to say I've spoken less than 10 sentences to my relatives this whole period. o.O I've either been hiding in my little cosy corner listening to emo music on my headphones, or sleeping the day away. like how i slept 2 hrs straight at my grandma's house today. hah. but that was partly coz i was drunk. =/
i wonder if i'll still continue visiting my cousins and relatives next time when i'm older. even if i do, wld i have anything to say to them apart from 'happy new year!' ? =S
cny holds no meaning for me anymore.
*sorry for the emo post*
posted @ 9:24 PM
Saturday, February 17, 2007
this has been a crazy crazy week. i almost felt like a j1 again. all de letters and presents during vday, photo whoring, ponning lessons, baking cookies till 3am!!, k-boxing overnight, dancing in the middle of the street at 4am, fac dancing in the central plaza, cheering my lungs out, walking aimlessly in town...hahaha..totally nt what one wld expect a j2 life to be. but then again, what fungg said was true, "who said j2s can't have fun?" hahahaa yea! =)
mon was girl's retail therapy at orchard! mainly for v day gifts. wanted to do some new yr shopping too...but racking our brains for our angel/mortal gifts seemed to have drained all our energy away. haha. but felt accomplished anyway. hahah..and its one of the first few times i've seen town since sch started! =) retail therapy actually cured shum of her illness too! o.O
dinner at mos, and i still havent had my milkshake!! =(
tues was further preparation for v day. haha. i think its like the most elaborate event in hc la. at least every single prsn's involved. heh. so oli n i decided to bake cookies. haha. her trng ended late and so did my aep. so we started at 9pm! omg...and she went home at 11pm! and my oven only stopped radiating heat finally at 3am. heh. my first time baking till so early. but glad de 2nd batch of cookies onwards werent burnt and were quite nice. (:
the cookies in the oven.
awaiting the clock to ring.
us n de cookies (:vday on wed. so much for writing notes till 4am! hahaha. so i went to sch after 2 hrs of sleep with heavy eyebags. T_T but all that present giving frenzy and hugs succeeded in keeping me awake. hehe. felt so loved! (:
the class girls and oli's lovely 24" balloon! hahaa.
we love tofuGIRL! (:
and other cute stuff!
fungg shum n i with jon's super cute red octopus! haha. shum looks like it yea?
KENNY de ANGEL!
hongwei and his beloved. (:
hongwei wearing his vday gift from his beloved. (:
my angel (:
yingtse and my mortal (:
one great surprise of the day came frm de dear oac guys. omg! i nv knew they cld be so sweet. (: getting personalised gifts and messages for every girl in oac. hahaa. really really made me smile like an idiot. loveeeeee the bazooka! thanx so so so much! (:
me and the bazooka! =D
me in tracee's cool shades frm the ezoac guys!
the stupid scandal board that the guys came up with. arghhh!!! fungg n i were trying to cover up the photos. haha.
the 3 guys behind all that.
the long awaited firedrill. haha. and we ended up photowhoring. shijia ended up laming..saying that its so hot out on the field we might catch fire before the school does.after sch was waiting patiently for x-country. while i brought my gifts up to my studio space, i decided to brg my classmates on a tour to the legendary art room!! wheee... and we ended up playing pictionary with gb de pictionary man! hahaha. stupid guy who goes one HUMONGOUS round to illustrate de wrd. but it amusing nonetheless.
kenneth leading the gang. o.O
shums n me! =)
me n my hardworking dance partner wonka! =)cross country was relatively slack as compared to last yr coz tracee n i intelligenlty pulled ourselves out of de competitive round. haha yay. so the JTF were running together this yr. (: enjoyable run. with 2 other gd frens. and lots of encouragement along the way. yea. my last x-country run in sch too. =)
very proud of our class competitive runners, oli, peiyu, jeriel and ruiyi (: especially oli, who had so run with a sprained ankle. i can understand how she must have felt..bearing the excruciating pain and still pushing urself and telling urself not to stop. gd job pple (: our jnrs were good too...haha.
it was hard to drag myself outta bed on thurs. seriously...having sch on thurs after x-country and a day before celebration is just plain weird. why can't we have the day off? but nvm...at least i sustained my day by looking forward to the end of sch. and ponning siva's lecture! hahaha. =/
went for dance session after sch. and i twisted my ankle again. =/ hahaha. opps. aep lesson was interesting. but the end of it was even better! woo~
highlight of the day..overnight k-boxing! (:
karweng n i managed to drag our dance ic with us...hahaha. so karweng cld master the dance. -.- haha jkjk.
singing with emotions.zi-highing and photowhoring:
karweng =)
ahmad =D
queen yeo (:
peiyu XD
taking a nap
and waking up to sing his bimbotic songs by tata young and jolin. thats karweng.
dance ic falling into deep slumber suddenly...
and waking up suddenly.
the canto pair.
singing some romantic duet =)
shijia and peiyu
hongwei n peiyu. gaowei! =/
the girls
later when the jnrs came at 2am. haha. they were all falling asleep..at least qinsheng was. haha. and he was super unglam =/the best part of the outing was dancing and striking lots of act cool poses in the middle of the road behind youth park. haha. reminds me of bike hike. i miss biking!! and being out on the streets at unearthly hours. =)
ahmad doing baby freeze.
06a13 k-boxing clan! (:
ezoac! hahaha. (:we wanted to do something super ezoac and we decided on jumps. haha. but we never knew capturing a good shot of jumps was so difficult. i think we jumped at least 15 times before we finally settled on something less challenging. haha. oh wells..nvm. morning pt! aaron and PTIs! you guys must be so touched we're so enthu abt morning PT. =)
sitting in the middle of the road
karweng diligently learning the dance from dance ic. yayy.. all hardwork paid off! (:
while the 4 of us peiyu, shijia, me, hongwei were slacking =/
taking a break from dancing
hongwei stoning. haha. i think this photo is damn cool!.
this merz cab tt drove past thinking tt we're some drunkards high on drugs. hahaha.
jnrs (:at 5.30am, we decided to head back to sch. shijia ahmad n i took the earlier cab, and alighted at hc bustop. we thought de other 3 wld alight at the bustop too..but who noes! they took it straight into hc! hahaha. so while waiting aimlessly for them. shijia n i did something stupid like capturing screenshot photos.
shijia's story...
one morning, shijia was at the bustop. she was very bored.
'what shd i do?'
she started racking her clever brain for ideas.
'ahhh i got it!'
i shall do the ares dance!junhua's story...
the lonely girl was sleeping at the bustop at some unearthly hour.
suddenly she saw a ghost!
she was so shocked she jumped up!
and got into a trance.
later she fainted by the roadside in that exact same pose coz she stoned for too long.
i made shijia hug the dustbin coz she sacrifaced me for all those poses while i made her look cool and stylish. haha. but she didn't really hug the dustbin la.
the class at cny celebrations! (:
k box gang in sch. i just realised this photo is pretty symmetrical.
watching from a different perspective. as a snr (not involved in the street market) and as an audience (no more performing in the co). felt quite weird watching the co play without me being part of it. probably the first time watching hcco (my batch) play, from the audience's POV. haha. but after a while it felt normal again. i think its good that i'm not feeling too great a loss.
JTF! i'm so gonna miss these 2 pple.
the reds!! we own fac dance comp! ARES RAWKS! plz ignore that finger.
getting ready for mass dance.the highlight of the day was fac dance comp. and it was really the HIGHLIGHT of the day. coz ARES owned the dance floor!!!!! =DDDD *screams with ecstacy* omg...i'm so glad we got the title. but more glad we had the spirit. cny is really a festival for ares. all that red decor stretched across the central plaza and around the whole school, tgt with our red shirts and burning passion, we tore the whole school down! woo~ i think we do look intimidating. haha. good job everyone who danced and cheered. and a13 pple who were so enthu in learning the dance! (: good job to fac comm and dance ics who were so stressed over this whole thing. hardwork pays off. haha. (:
everything ended on a high note. but shijia n i were still rather tired. we were feeling jubilant, but we couldn't express it. haha. we spoke in monotonous voices throughout the entire shopping trip. but still glad for everything that happened.
going home with shijia was rather pensieve. we were listening to emo songs and talking about nostalgic stuff. one really weird thing that happened while we were shopping in town was that we didn't see a single hc prsn on the street. the thought was quite frightening and discomforting. i never knew i wld feel this way, being in a place i know so well yet feeling so foreign and unwelcomed. =S you might think we're over-reacting. but both of us were seriously paranoid abt this missing case of the hc students. haha. everywhere we walked, we looked out for familiar faces and fac shirts, and everytime we saw one, we heaved a sigh of relieve. but even though we saw a few hc students, they were all straglers, not one large group that we'd usually see. there were many other groups of students from other schools. anywhere but hc. then it started raining and added even more gloom to our unsettling mind.
we were sharing our thoughts. and realised it'd be less than a year before we finally have to let go of school days. proper school days where you have a class to hang arnd with and look up whenever. i'll really miss being a student and being in a school. that sense of belonging cannot be found anywhere else. even waking up at 5.30am every morning and reporting for assembly. being caught for flouting the school rules. i'll really miss it.
i'm alr missing my class n oac. new years at home have never really been enjoyable for me. except for the fact that i get to rest. reunion meals are more of a must-have than willingly present. even if i were the latter, it always ends up in a different light. its always been self-delusional. haiz.
happy chinese new year anyway! (:
posted @ 2:03 PM